Saturday, January 25, 2014

lazy Saturday

Leaving Café Lemont

It's snowing something fierce outside, and I'm sitting at Café Lemont in State College, just letting the cafe noise wash over me and enjoying the hum of warmth and activity.  All of the mugs here are handmade by a lady who sells them in house, and mine has a thick, bulbous ceramic base that you can cup in your hands, and it's full of warm, frothy latte.  My friend and neighbor E and her boyfriend are at a table a few feet away, and she's explaining to him what garden path sentences are, and the couple behind me are code switching between Arabic and English.  I love this café.  It's furnished with what seems to be antique/thift store furniture, and there are these beautiful dreamy paintings on the walls painted by a local artist.  They're the types of art I'd like to have in my house someday, maybe in some far off future when I'm making a professor's salary instead of a postdoc one, and I can do things like buy art from local artists that I like.


Inside Café Lemont

I've been feeling down this week.  Very intermittently, though; it comes and goes, and thankfully it mostly goes.  That is to say, most days I'm really happy and there are so many good things in my life right now.  I love my job and my work, and I'm making some really great friends here.  I've made it a point to exercise every day since I got back from break, and that's been really nice.  It is so cold here right now.  Too cold for running some days, really, and I am not exactly a wimp when it comes to running in the cold.  15 degrees is about my limit, though, because below that and it just hurts your skin and lungs.  So I go running as long as it's not too windy and biting, but that's usually only once a week right now.  The other days, I've been doing strength training-type stuff at home, and I'm getting noticeably stronger, which I really like.  I haven't had much upper body strength since I was playing volleyball and lifting weights regularly in high school, and I'd like to get back to the point where I'm actually strong-strong.  Winter in central PA is a pretty good time to work on that, it turns out.

Last night I had two bad dreams (two!) and I don't know what to make of that; I can't tell if I'm in a weird-sad mood today because of the dreams, or if already being in a slightly weird-sad mood is what brought the dreams on in the first place.  I think it's a little bit of both, unfortunately.  But I woke up in the middle of the night and was just so, so sad and couldn't get back to sleep for a little bit.  Thankfully I did get back to sleep after not too long, but then I had a second bad dream, and then it was morning, so I stayed awake after that.  But it was just not a restful night's sleep, and it's definitely affected my day today.  Bad dreams are funny when you're an adult, too.  Not funny-ha-ha, obviously, but funny-isn't-that-weird.  You'd think they'd go away when you grow up, but really all that changes is the things that feel out of your control enough to make you feel scared.  I don't mean this to be as cryptic and worrying as it sounds.  I'm just musing on the fact that at nearly 30 years old, it's still possible to wake up feeling freaked out from a bad dream!

Well, one of my postdoc friends is here now, so maybe that will help get me out of my funk.  I decided to dress up a little bit today, and it's almost silly how much that perked me up.  I decided to wear a dress and put on some mascara and even a tiny little spritz of perfume, and it's kind of fun to feel the tiniest bit fancier than normal.

* * * * * * *

We just had an awesome conversation about science and programming and spectra, and now I'm feeling much better.  I have these three friends I met through the Penn State Postdoc Society, and they are some of the most interesting, fun, smart women I've ever known.  The one who's here now is an astrophysicist, the one I went out to dinner with last night is a biological anthropologist, and the one who might be joining us later today is a cancer researcher.  So basically we sit around and have hugely nerdy conversations and it is so so so much fun.

So... things are good, in the scheme of things.  But I miss my boyfriend very much, and that sucks, and I still don't know how long I'm going to be here or where I'm going next or for how long, and that kind of sucks too.  (The other side of the coin is that it's fun and exciting by turns, but I definitely vacillate between those feelings with some regularity.)

On a related note, it's looking pretty strongly like I'll be staying here for at least one more year, maybe two, and conceivably even three.  I have a near-guarantee of funding for next year, and I also have two grants that are going to be reviewed very soon, and if one of those comes through (fingers and toes crossed!), then I would have 2-3 years of my very own funding.  So within two months, I will know for sure just how long I'll be staying here, and I think that will help a little bit with my mild feelings of drifting-related anxiety.

Hmph.  I think I'll try to go back to reading Game of Thrones now.

Monday, January 20, 2014

I still love you, blog.

Ohhh blog.  My poor, poor blog.  Here it sits, all on its lonesome, with no one to love it, and no one to write in it, and therefore probably no one to read it.  Poor, sad, un-updated blog.

I will fix you, blog.  I will write in you right now while my apples bake in the oven and make my house smell like yummy cinnamon dessert.

Where to start?  It's been nearly two months!  (For shame.)  Well...

I spent two weeks in Berkeley at the end of November/beginning of December.  It was so nice to see everyone.  I mean, that's an understatement, really.  The nice thing about only having been gone for three months is that it was so normal to be back in Berkeley!  Everything was just as I left it, really.  The only weird part was that I didn't have an apartment anymore.  I kept thinking, "Okay, well, time to go home now..." except that someone else lives in my "home" now.  That was small potatoes, though.  I was surprised at just how normal everything felt, and it was very comforting, but slightly unsettling at the same time.  I keep bumping up against this feeling that I have multiple homes, and multiple places where I sort of belong.  In some ways, it's a nice feeling, obviously, because there are lots of places I can go where I mostly feel at home.  But the flip side, of course, is that there's literally nowhere in my life where I feel completely at home, and it's enough to start me down the path into Existential Crisis Land, if I'm in the wrong mood.

Anyway, we did Thanksgiving, and it was really wonderful.  I went to a conference, and I got to hang out with lots of people I had missed very much.  I sort of wasted a day driving down to Stanford to give a talk... "wasted" only because it wasn't particularly well attended, and I would have been better served by going to the last day of the conference I was ostensibly in town to attend... but it was okay.  I also submitted another research grant that probably won't get funded, but you never know!  And I had a great meeting with one of my advisors, where we set down The Grand Plan for how I'm going to get my dissertation stuff published.  That plan involved me submitting at least one (preferably two) papers by the end of January, so... ahem....  (There's still time, there's still time, I tell myself.)

Then I came back to State College for a few weeks, where I must have done something, but I can't for the life of me remember what.

And then I drove to Illinois for Christmas, which is a freaking long drive, in case you were wondering.  It was a nice drive - at least until you get past Columbus, Ohio, at which point it turns into cornfields-cornfields-cornfields-flat-flat-flat.  Christmas was also nice, but I found myself missing J a lot and really looking forward to heading back to Berkeley.

So, then I headed back to California and spent two more weeks in Berkeley.  Well, sort of; we actually drove down to Santa Barbara right away and spent a few days hanging out in the glorious sunshine, running on the beach, and doing the sorts of things that feel like you're rubbing it in people's faces if you tell them about it.  Suffice it to say that I adore Santa Barbara, and we had a wonderful time down there.

We drove back up to Berkeley after a few days, and I started to get myself back into work mode a little bit.  I was having a very nice time, in fact: walking to a nice cafe in the morning, working for a few hours before meeting up with a friend or two for lunch, then maybe going out for dinner or just hanging out in the evenings.  Then - BLAMMO - food poisoning.  Nooooo fuuuuuuun.  I think it must have been leftover Thai food, because a few hours after I finished it off, I suddenly started getting really nauseous and uncomfortable, and then I was up all night violently ridding my body of all its contents.  Thankfully I had someone who apparently loves me very much who was willing to go out and buy me popsicles and Gatorade, but that was the only remotely good part about it, and my gastrointestinal tract was noticeably messed up for close to a week.

And here I am back in State College!  It's been nice to be back, and it's nice to start getting back into the swing of things.  I've been trying really hard to finish up one paper and get to work on a different paper, and have been making decent progress on both, so that's pretty good.  I've also been enjoying being back in my own kitchen so I can cook to my heart's delight; I baked some really nice bread yesterday, and I've been roasting lots of veggies to eat over baked potatoes, and baking lots of apples to eat over cold, tangy yogurt.  Maybe it's the aftermath of the food poisoning and feeling so out of whack for a week, but I've mostly been craving healthy stuff, so I'm just rolling with it.

Oh!  Speaking of nutritional anomalies, here is a doozy: I think I have a sensitivity to eggs!  Isn't that the lamest thing ever?!  I love eggs!  I eat so many eggs!!  Maybe that's the problem, or something; I've been trying to reduce the amount of empty carbohydrates in my life and have been largely replacing them with eggs for a while now.  Scrambled eggs and veggies instead of oatmeal for breakfast, lentils and eggs instead of beans and rice for dinner, that sort of thing.  But, when I was in Illinois for Christmas I realized my skin totally and completely cleared up, and it hadn't been that clear for a while.  So I realized that two major things had been removed from my diet as a result of not being at home: eggs and dairy.  I decided to experiment when I got back, and went back to eating my normal amount of dairy but still not eating any eggs, and my skin has stayed clear.  I guess the thing to do now would be to have scrambled eggs for breakfast and see what happens, but I'm worried that if I do that, I'll have incontrovertible evidence that I have a dietary sensitivity to eggs, and I kind of just don't want to know, so I haven't eaten any eggs for like a month now.  It is bumming me out a little bit.

The other thing that's been a little weird lately (going back to what I was saying before) is that I keep forgetting where I am, which is a very strange feeling.  Not like, "wait, am I in the kitchen or in the living room?", more like, "wait, am I on the East Coast or the West Coast?"  I never in a million years thought that would be an issue in my life, but here we are in 2014 and I'm one of those annoying jet setters who commutes across a continent and can't keep her time zones straight.

Anyway.  In conclusion, I guess: life is weird, and it only gets weirder.  But that's not a complaint: life is very, very nice, too.  It's just really not what I thought it would be, and right now I feel like I'm very much along for the ride.  So I'll keep baking apples and trying to write papers and living half on one coast and half on the other for the foreseeable future.  Quelle vie bizarre et inattendue que je mène!

Monday, November 25, 2013

Berkeley, here I come!

Earlier this week, I went for a run.  I use this website called Gmap Pedometer to see how far my runs are, and you have to type in your town for it to zoom in.  So I get back, and I sit down, and I type, "berkeley, ca" into the search bar.

Whoops.

It was actually the first time I'd done that here.  When I first moved to Berkeley, oh so many moons ago, I typed "urbana, il" multiple times - sheer force of habit - and it made me a little sad every time.  This made me a little sad too, except that I'm leaving for Berkeley today, so mostly it was just a funny little trick that my fingers played on me.

Now I have to sit on planes and in airports for something like 11 hours, but it will all be worth it.  I can't wait to see everyone!  I am so so so excited!

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Niagara Falls

I'm back!

I'm back because I'm home and don't know what else to do with myself, because I don't want to work tonight --

-- phone call from my postdoc advisor.  Turns out I don't have to teach next semester if I don't want to! So now I have to decide if I want to teach.  Interesting. --

Anyway, yeah, not working any more tonight because my grant isn't due until Tuesday, and it's actually in pretty good shape.  It's not quite there, but I have several days to make what are some relatively minor edits and additions at this point, so I'm just about done worrying about it.

So I might as well tell you about my trip to Niagara Falls!

I didn't drive up with the express purpose of seeing Niagara Falls, of course.  I went to go visit my friend!


M is originally from Buffalo, is a current grad student at Berkeley, but is back in Buffalo for this semester.  I drove up to visit her a few weeks back, and it was such a beautiful drive.  Man, driving through the Appalachians and up into western New York with fall in full swing… not something I ever thought I would experience, but it was absolutely gorgeous, and I'm so glad I got the chance to do it.

So seeing M was wonderful, of course (I really miss her!), and she was super excited to take me to see Niagara Falls, which is like a 15 minute drive from her house.  Isn't that crazy?  I can't even imagine growing up right by Niagara Falls.





The pictures really don't do it justice.  The amount of power behind that incredible amount of water is absolutely mind-blowing.  It was surprisingly scary, actually!





So I had a wonderful weekend, and it was a really neat experience, and really nice to catch up with my friend!

I also just downloaded these pictures from my phone, and there was this one from the Color Run, a 5K I did back in September:




It's weird; you can't tell at all from this picture how much weird chalk-paint I had on myself.  That… was maybe an experience for another post.

Anyway, Niagara was awesome, I live in a really gorgeous part of the country, and I am really happy to have a car so that I can get out and see it!

Speaking of that, Jevon was here a few weekends ago, and we went back to Fallingwater so he could check it out, and so I could try to get a better tour guide this time!  I think the trip was a success on both counts.

Okay, that's probably enough from me for now.  Two posts in one day, imagine that!

Que le temps passe vite!

Ohhh the shame.  Two months since my last update!  No blog posts at all in the month of October!  I am so, so slacking.

I don't even know what my problem is.  It's not like I don't have things to talk about.  I'm in a new town, and I really like it, even!  I have some new friends, and we do fun stuff sometimes, even!  I had an awesome trip up to Niagara Falls to visit my friend from Berkeley, even!  And it's not like I'm working so hard that I never have free time or something.  Far from it, in fact.

Let's see, what am I up to these days?  I'll do a quick update in the next few minutes, and then I'll try to do a post dedicated to Niagara Falls/Buffalo soon.

- I can't write for too long this morning because I am subbing for a friend/colleague who is at a conference this week, and she needs someone to cover her class.  So I have to show up and play a movie for some undergrads, and have them fill out attendance cards.

- Speaking of teaching, I have a meeting tomorrow to find out what class I'm teaching next semester.  I have my fingers crossed for Intro to Psycholinguistics, but if there's not enough enrollment, I'll be doing First Language Acquisition.  Either would be fine, I guess, but I'm hoping for Psycholing because I've never taught it before and I'm more comfortable with the subject material.

- I don't really know where the time goes.  I have lots of meetings, and I do lots of reading.  I've been writing a lot lately because I'm applying for a grant (due on Monday), and trying to submit a paper for publication before I apply.  I'm also applying for two other grants, and probably a job (all in the first week of December - yikes), but I'm not quite thinking about that yet.  Before that, I have to finish the grant I'm working on, plus submit this paper, and submit a short response paper, plus I was hoping to have my dissertation stuff submitted somewhere by the end of this month, but that's looking less likely now.  I'm presenting a poster at the ASA in San Francisco the first week of December, so making a good poster is my first priority.  And I'm giving two talks that week, so I should probably work on those too!  See, it sounds like I should be really busy, but I don't really feel that busy.

- I'll be in Berkeley really soon, and I can't wait!  I get in on November 25th and am staying until December 9th.  Two weeks!  Lots of time to hang out, see friends, check out the old haunts.  I. can. not. wait.

- But before that, I have a conference in Toronto… a week from today!  Whoa!  A week from today I will be driving up to Toronto with some folks from my lab group.  It's only about 5 1/2 hours (isn't that crazy?) so we're carpooling to save some money.  I don't have to present anything at this conference, either - I'm just supposed to hang out and check it out, so that will be pretty fun, I think!

- Umm, I did a half marathon the weekend before last.  It was great, actually, but sort of… unceremonious.  I finished in two hours even, so I basically met my goal, which was unexpected and awesome.  I've been trying to up my running, because I freaking love fall, and I love to be outside enjoying the crisp fall air, but it's been sort of hard when we don't get that much daylight.  I've been having a horrible time waking up in the morning… it's a little better now that the time has changed back, and it gets light around 6:45 instead of 7:45.  I could conceivably go running in the mornings now, I suppose, but I haven't gotten my act together enough to actually do that.

Well, I'm getting antsy because I have to get ready to head to campus.  But I will do a Niagara Falls post soon!  And maybe I will talk about my new friends, too.  The super short version is that I have three postdoc friends, and they're totally awesome, and I've also gotten a bit closer with my neighbor (whose class I'm covering this morning).  So, life is good!

Saturday, September 7, 2013

pretty stuff from my phone camera

I have a car!!!!



It is so exciting!  I love it!  And now I can go wherever I want, whenever I want!

I also snapped two nice photos of campus on a whim the other day.






It really is a very nice campus.

I gave my colloquium talk yesterday, and then I bought my car (which was a minor ordeal, involving a surprise trip to the DMV to get a PA driver's license... at least that's over now), and then I finally got home around 6:00 and just zonked out for the night.  I knew I was tired, so I didn't set my alarm for this morning, and I woke up at 11:00 am, which I haven't done in, like, years.  I usually can only do that when I'm sick or something.  It was totally weird.

Then I ate some zucchini muffins and drank some tea, curled up on my new couch and watched a movie, and then went for a 6.5 mile run to try to tire myself out.  This evening I drove out to Wegmans, everybody's favorite grocery store 'round these parts, and also stopped by a furniture store to scope out some rugs, and by Michael's to pick up some crafting stuff.

Now I'm home and I'm actually pretty tired, so the longer-than-usual run (and the pumpkin beer I picked up tonight) must have done their job.  I might watch another movie!  And then bright and early tomorrow morning, I'm heading out to see Falling Water, the famous Frank Lloyd Wright house in southwestern PA, with my neighbor and fellow language researcher at PSU.

Man, today feels really good.  Things are good.

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

One Week in State College, PA (a report card)

Today marks my eighth full day in State College, so I think it's about time for a report card detailing my preliminary impressions.  Here is a list of ten things that have been particularly striking to me over the past week, along with what I think of them, in case you care.  (And if you're reading my blog, it seems like you might actually care what I think about things, for some reason.)


Population density.  My first inclination is to just say A-freaking-plus and be done with it.  Don't get me wrong.  I love Berkeley, very much.  But I can't help but feel how much more at peace I am here, and it's definitely due to the relative lack of people.  There's just fewer people here, and less noise, and more space, and it is so nice.  I live in a beautiful neighborhood, with tall leafy trees and big yards where families can run around and play.  There are many nice things about living in a relatively urban area, for sure.  But I think a place like this is really the place for me.  The downside, of course, is that life is much more car-dependent here.  I was totally fine for five years in Berkeley without a car.  But a week in SC (three days of which I rented a car anyway) is already a little annoying.  This place is just not as set up for car-free living.  It's doable, but it will be easier once I've gotten a car, and I don't have to do things like walk for 45 minutes to get to Ace Hardware and discover they don't have what I wanted anyway.  All things considered, then: A-.  (It's the stuff that's generally correlated with low population density that brings this one down a bit.)

Penn State campus.  It's really pretty!  Prettier than I expected, actually.  Let's be clear, it's no Berkeley, but no campus really compares to Berkeley, with its eucalyptus grove and redwood trees and babbling brooks.  The PSU campus is pretty in an East Coast, brick buildings, lots of foliage and criss crossing paths sort of way.  It's definitely more like the U of I campus than like Berkeley, although it seems geographically more compact than the U of I.  Definitely classy, but welcoming too, and that's a nice combination.  B+

My new department.  It's going to be kind of weird to be in a psychology department, I can tell.  I got a tour of our facilities yesterday and discovered that my little branch of our department occupies the bottom two floors of a six story building occupied entirely by psychologists.  There are so many psychologists.  It is weird.  But I've got to say, everyone has been fantastic so far.  Incredibly warm, nice, welcoming, and helpful.  It definitely doesn't feel like home in the way Berkeley did, and I sort of doubt that it ever will, since I spent five years with the same small group of folks who all knew me pretty well.  (It was kind of like high school in that respect.)  But there are definite perks to being in such a big powerhouse of a department here.  They have some serious resources, for one thing; the building is beautiful and modern, and the research facilities are really great.  It's going to take some adjusting, but I'm pretty sure I'll manage to get used to it.  A-, for reasons of sentimentality.

Downtown area.  Super cute!  It's kind of like... Green Street plus Downtown Urbana, if you're an Illinois person, and maybe... Elmwood plus Northside, if you're a Berkeley person.  Lots of places to eat, extremely safe, but also has a distinctly collegiate feel to it.  One thing that's really interesting to me is that the types of restaurants here are just nothing like Berkeley.  First of all, the actual-restaurant-to-bar ratio is waaaaay tipped towards the bar end of the scale, which is the opposite of Berkeley.  Also, there's a lot more "normal" food here than in Berkeley, and by that I mean the offerings here are not as interesting.  The more mainstream types of "ethnic cuisine" are definitely represented (Thai, Chinese, Mexican), but you can replace things like Vietnamese and Ethiopian with like, Italian and German.  There's a German deli and an Austrian deli downtown, and that kind of blows my mind.  I think I'd rather have Ethiopian food, but I guess I'll take my time here as an opportunity to become reacquainted with the food of my people.  A-

Undergraduate student body.  It's pretty weird to be surrounded by thousands of 19 year olds attending a Big Ten school again.  It's taking me back to 2003 in a major way.  If I put my 2003 brain on, it feels pretty normal.  Like, oh yeah, I remember frat boys with backwards baseball caps and sorority girls with bleached blond hair and short shorts.  It is weird to walk to campus through my neighborhood and be surrounded by evidence that 50,000 rowdy undergrads inhabit this town.  There are gaggles of made-up girls in sequined tank tops roaming from house to house, and boys in polo shirts crowding on to dilapidated porches to play beer pong and yell at passers-by.  And I say "girls" and "boys" because it is striking to me how much they resemble children.  I cannot believe I am going to be in charge of educating these young minds.  ("Animals," my neighbor calls them.  "A hoard of savage beasts.")  When I think about how much the people in some of my classes drove me crazy in college, I get a little bit apprehensive about being in charge of them next semester.  But whatever: for now, it feels strangely familiar, and I'm okay with it.  B

Smoking.  There are so many people who smoke here!  It is really weird!  I think what this actually means is that there are very few people who smoke in Berkeley (well, who smoke cigarettes, anyway...) and I didn't notice that, because I don't smoke.  But now that there are people smoking everywhere I go, it's very noticeable, and very strange.  On the other hand, I've been here a whole week and have yet to walk by someone getting high on the sidewalk, so, there's that.  C

Driver/pedestrian etiquette.  Remember when I moved to California and was perpetually annoyed with drivers actually stopping for me when I was approaching a cross walk?  Well, I have now come full circle, because I'm really confused about when I'm supposed to cross the street.  I lived in California long enough to accept the fact that drivers expected - even wanted - me to cross the street in front of them.  That is definitely not the case here, and I'm having a hard time remembering what I'm supposed to do when I get to a cross walk at the same time as a motor vehicle.  Do I slow down?  Speed up?  make eye contact and wave them ahead?  Not make eye contact and assume they're going to just barely come to a rolling stop anyway?  Lay flat on my stomach and wait until it's over??  I don't know what to do anymore.  It's usually fine because they usually exhibit no signs whatsoever of detecting my presence and just blow through the intersection anyway.  I guess I'll get used to that again soon.  What's interesting to me is that driver/pedestrian etiquette is only noticeable (and really, only dangerous) when you don't have an intuitive sense of how it works.  I'm not making a value judgment in either direction, just observing that the important thing is to internalize the customs, whatever they may be.  S, for satisfactory.

Pennsylvania liquor laws.  This is the first place I've ever lived where you have to go to a special store to buy alcohol.  It's stupid.  And it doesn't accomplish anything except making me go to a special store to buy alcohol.  Apparently you can only buy two six-packs of beer at a time here, too?  I dunno, I read that somewhere.  The upshot is that I haven't bought any alcohol since I've been here, because alcohol stores make me feel kind of skeezy.  (I think there may be separate stores for beer vs. wine and liquor, too.  It sort of looks like "bottle shops" are for beer, and there are plenty of those around, but I haven't seen any wine or liquor stores.)  Anyway, why can't I just buy a six-pack of Blue Moon at the grocery store like a normal person, Pennsylvania?  What's the freakin' deal?  F

Farmers' market.  The farmers' market here (and CSAs; see below) might make up for the stupid liquor laws.  I went to the farmers' market for the first time today, and it was so cute.  Just like everything in this town is so cute.  Pretty much all of the vendors were Amish, which is kind of a trip when you're used to the Berkeley farmers' market.  The Berkeley markets are huge, with weird but awesome California produce (avocados! $1 each!  fresh figs! $5/basket!), and are filled with a wonderfully and totally Berkelified clientele.  Lots of tattoos and piercings and half-mullets and homemade clothes and people who probably shop exclusively at the farmers' market because we only have one Earth, man.  And I love that, don't get me wrong, but it is pretty much the quintessential liberal hippie paradise.  When you're used to that and then suddenly the person behind the table is a sweet little Amish boy wearing overalls and a straw hat and calling you ma'am, it's kind of a trip.  Anyway, the farmers' market was amazing, and Amish products are amazing, and the prices were dirt cheap!!  Maybe because the vendors have less far to travel to get here?  Maybe because the cost of producing things is just so much cheaper here?  (Gas, land, water, fertilizer... it's probably all way cheaper here.)  In any case, I spent way less than I ever spent at the Berkeley FM, and got way more, so a big ol' thumbs up for that.  I'm a little sad I can't get fresh figs anymore, but what are you gonna do?  A

CSA offerings.  Related to the farmers' market offerings, there are some amazing CSAs out here.  I found this dairy CSA, where you get to order raw, local, organic dairy products every week and they deliver them straight to your door.  I think I have died and gone to dairy fat heaven (which is probably what my heaven would be anyway).  The only slight bummer is that produce shares are far less flexible here than in California.  In the Bay Area anyway, you can sign up for as many weeks of produce as you like, and stop and start your order whenever you like, and there's always plenty of local crops available year round.  Here the CSAs only run from March to November (because things don't grow from November to March, because I am back in the land of seasons), and you have to sign up for the full season in advance, which means you're plunking down $400 dollars in February for a half year's worth of fruit and vegetables.  Maybe to offset this slight bummer, there are other CSAs that run year round, like dairy products and herbs and fresh baked bread.  I'm totally doing the dairy one, and I'm going to try to find a winter vegetable share somewhere too, but those are a little few and far between.  In any case, way to go, PA.  A

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Everything is wonderful.

Everything is wonderful!

I freaking love this little town.  It is so gosh darned cute, and everyone I have met so far is ridiculously nice and welcoming.

I love my apartment.  It is beautiful, and huge, and perfect.

I love that my stuff is arriving from California tomorrow, so I will actually have normal things, like a normal person, and not be sleeping on a borrowed mattress on the floor (although that has contributed to imparting a certain zen-like air to my evenings thus far).

I love that I have already managed to acquire a sweet desk and a sweet office chair.  The former was discovered by yours truly at a used furniture store (which had a surprising amount of high quality stuff!) and is an old, classy, solid wood thing that looks like it might be from the 60's, and the latter was purchased at Staples today and is the nicest office chair I have ever owned.

I love that my Penn State ID says "Faculty/Staff".  Tee-hee!

I love that I found a couch that I love and a futon that I love (for my guest room/office), and that those things will be delivered next week.

I love that I finished grading final papers and entered final grades for my class this evening.

I love that Jevon is going to be here in just over a week!

I love that I have already been invited to participate in a color run 5K in September, and I love that I went for a beautiful evening run yesterday.

I love that there are crickets and frogs here, and that it sounds and smells and feels like summer.

I love that I am not writing my dissertation anymore!!  I love that I have free time to just adjust, and get used to things, and meet people, and explore my new town.

I just love everything.  This is a great week.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Dr. Melinda! Dr. Melinda!

It's done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

... now I have to grade final papers and a final exam.

Sunday, August 4, 2013

I. DON'T. WANT. TO TALK. ABOUT. ARTICULATORY. DURATION. ANY. MORE.

NO MORE.

IDON'TWANNATALKABOUTITANYMOREDOYOUHEARME????

Oh my god, you guys, 26 pages of talking about the duration of articulatory movements.  I want it to be over, and somehow, it's never over.  There is always more to say.

I am so goddamned close to being done with this background chapter, and I just don't think I can finish it tonight.  10+ hours a day of writing for four days straight, and I'm having a really hard time keepin' on keepin' on.

All I have left now is to summarize my research questions.  And I have started doing so, but I'm hitting the wall again, where I can't think straight or form coherent sentences anymore.  I'm getting all spacey and glassy-eyed, and I can't tell what's important, or remember how I intended to finish my sentences by the time I'm a clause and a half in.

GAH I really wanted to be done tonight.  But it might be time to pack it in.

Good lord I am ready to be done.  I have made so, so much progress over the past few days, and I am getting so close, both temporally and work-wise.  I still have to write my discussion chapter, but I kind of don't even care at this point.  I mean, I know it's going to suck too, but I am just so, so close that I can taste it.

DO YOU HEAR ME, DISSERTATION?  YOUR DAYS ARE NUMBERED, MY FRIEND.



8/5, ETA: I just emailed my background chapter to my advisors.  I'm... kind of happy?  I guess?  But also kind of... vaguely angry that I just worked for about 15 hours straight.  (Such that obviously the only appropriate course of action is to whine some more to the interwebs.  Sorry.  This is my venting space right now.)  Also: feeling apprehensive that every day this week is basically going to be like this.